student life,

Professor Apologizes After Rescheduling Office Hours No One Planned to Attend to Begin With

Steven Underhill Sep 29, 2023
Professor Apologizes After Rescheduling Office Hours No One Planned to Attend to Begin With
Share this

In an email memo sent out this afternoon, HIST 0187 Professor Fulcrum Banks apologized profusely for rescheduling his Wednesday office hours from 12-1 pm to 2-3 pm EST. Banks cited a “meeting that totally slipped [his] mind” as the cause for the postponement, and repeatedly thanked students for their “ability to adapt to flexible scheduling.”

In addition to his regular in-person Monday/Wednesday/Friday office hours, Banks also provided links to his Tuesday/Thursday Zoom supplemental review sessions which he “designed specifically for exam preparation.” Barring any further unexpected scheduling snafus, Banks promised to be in his office in 2457 Posvar promptly at the start of office hours, and conceded that he would be “able to stick around a bit afterward” for any lingering questions.

Yet according to exit polling from Banks’ MWF 9-9:50 lecture in Lawrence 104, the majority of students were completely oblivious to the sudden and drastic change of schedule.

“Oh, his office hours? Really? When did you say he had them?” Junior Liliana Straub told The Pitiful News when asked for comment.

Sophomore Tobias Vaught admitted to taking a picture of the lecture slide that announced the change in class, but “ended up deleting the picture” to preserve storage space for the “iOS 17 update,” which he planned to conduct this evening.

Freshman Josephine Beauregard perked up at the mention of Office Hours, however when questioned she developed a dreamy expression and asked if “anyone knew if that hot TA who always rolled up his sleeves” was going to be there. If not, she knew of another section “with that TA who always put his hair up in a ponytail.”

Office hour attendance, although spiking in the week after the first exam, has largely stagnated. Experts attribute this to the commitment to a delicate work-life balance undertaken by the student body. Strict and rigorous exercise routines, moonlit walks, and “three day, four night” benders no doubt play a part.

At press time Banks was spotted furiously drafting yet another email, begging for forgiveness after posting Biweekly Chapter Review #2 Subtopic 12.3 (optional) late to the Canvas board.