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Eatery to Introduce NFTs to dining experience

The Eatery, along with many other dining halls found at other NCAA Div 1 schools, have started a line of NFTs which consist of the college logos as pixel art. The “art” will grant buy...

In Food and Culture, Oct 17, 2023

Protests briefly disrupt Board of Trustees meeting; administrators displeased

A series of disruptive actions interrupted the University of Pittsburgh’s Board of Trustees meeting on September 29. In the aftermath, administrators’ feelings on the disruptions rang...

In Current, Oct 16, 2023

Brave police and security guards hold back ruthless Pitt students from rushing the field after upset win

On Saturday, October 14th, the Pittsburgh Panthers pulled off a shocking upset win against undefeated ACC opponent Louisville. Coming into the matchup at Acrisure Stadium Heinz Field,...

In Sports, Oct 16, 2023

Professor Apologizes After Rescheduling Office Hours No One Planned to Attend to Begin With

In an email memo sent out this afternoon, HIST 0187 Professor Fulcrum Banks apologized profusely for rescheduling his Wednesday office hours from 12-1 pm to 2-3 pm EST. Banks cited a ...

In Student Life, Sep 29, 2023

Oakland’s Vigilantes Plead Residents to Refrain From Screaming “Help” in Middle of Night Unless in Sincere Danger

Many of Oakland’s very own amateur crimestoppers have begun to speak out against a viral trend where participants out in public loudly scream that they are in peril and require immedi...

In Student Life, Sep 29, 2023

Dr. Oz declared winner of Pennsylvania Senate race after thousands of absentee ballots arrive from New Jersey at the 11th hour

In a shocking turn of events, noted pseudoscientist and Harvard alumnus Dr. Mehmet Oz has been declared the winner of the Pennsylvania senate race after thousands of mail-in ballots p...

In Politics, Nov 15, 2022

Nordenberg Hall sets fire to its own residents in a bout of revenge, Resident Director claims

On Saturday, September 17th, Nordenberg Hall experienced its third fire-related evacuation of the semester. The hall, mainly inhabited by freshman students and misfortunate Resident A...

In Student Life, Oct 18, 2022

University of Pittsburgh Dining Hall Gets Name Change

As of October 1, 2022, The Eatery at Towers will now go by the name of The Shittery. This name change comes after multiple gastroenterologists at the University of Pittsburgh Medical ...

In Food and Culture, Oct 05, 2022

South Oakland Announces Rebrand to ‘Soak Land’ for Summer Season, Replaces Sidewalks with Slip-and-Slides

Today, officials of Pittsburgh’s best and brightest neighborhood announced a change that might take some getting used to. In a shocking move, the home for most of the University of Pi...

In Current, Jul 11, 2022

Opinion: It’s Time to Repeal the Third Amendment

Okay, okay, settle down now. I know that all of you 3rd Amendment stans might take this the wrong way, but I can assure you that I will have changed your mind on this subject by the e...

In Opinion, Jun 07, 2022